


Whispers

by rainingover



Category: B.A.P, K-pop
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-20
Updated: 2014-09-20
Packaged: 2018-02-18 03:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2333381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainingover/pseuds/rainingover
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daehyun's not used to this: Having nothing to say to each other. And it's weird.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whispers

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the TBB lightning drabble round 2014.

It starts in the van on the way back to the hotel. Or, rather, it doesn't start at all, and that's the problem.

Sunken into the back-seat by dead weights disguised as his limbs, Daehyun turns to Youngjae, opens his mouth, and--

Nothing comes out. He can't conjure up anything to say.

Youngjae doesn't notice, is fiddling with the buttons on his jacket, and then laughing at something out of the window: a child in little yellow rainboots, splashing at the side of the road as the van comes to a stop at a red light.

But it's not something Daehyun is used to, and he panics internally until the van starts to move again. He watches Youngjae out of the corner of his eye, and desperately thinks of something to talk about. Mouth opening like a fish three times more, until--

"Hey, uh, practise was good, right?" It comes out stilted, clumsy. Desperate.

Youngjae says, "Hmm? Yeah." Closes his eyes and presses his cheek against the window for the rest of the journey home.

Daehyun tries to emulate this, shuts his eyes, lets his head fall back against the headrest, but-- he feels kind of sick, and he doesn't think it's just from hunger pains.

It's just-- He's not used to this: Having nothing to say to each other. And it's weird. It's not _them_.

Or, maybe it is them, now, Daehyun thinks.

He wonders what this sudden inability to communicate might mean as he chews the side of his cheek, regrets it as the van goes over a manhole and he bites down involuntarily, tastes the metallic tang of blood.

"I just bit my cheek," he pokes Youngjae in the side.

"Did you?" Eyes still closed.

"Yeah... It hurt."

"Poor Daehyunnie." Youngjae says, but Daehyun can't hear a lot of conviction in his words.

He spends the rest of the journey biting the other cheek. Ponders over the fact that this might be the longest conversation they've had all day.

They order room service and Daehyun orders a stupid amount of food. Rationalises it, tells himself that it always helps to eat more when you're angry. Or maybe it's just a good excuse for no words to be spoken; it's rude to speak with your mouth full, after all, and Daehyun does sometimes remember this (though usually after someone else has reminded him).

They stack dishes onto the the room-service trolley in silence, and Daehyun thinks of the couples he's observed in restaurants before. The ones who sit back in their chairs, who sip their drinks, and eye other patrons. Who don't talk. The ones he always felt baffled over.

The ones he never thought they could become in a million years. And then, pictures himself and Youngjae, facing each other, fingering cutlery awkwardly until it's time to get the bill and drive home in silence.

He bites his cheek again.

Daehyun lies awake, brain in overdrive, as Youngjae snores softly next to him. Thinks, if they've somehow ran out of things to say to each other already - before they've even really begun, whilst they're still not-quite-boyfriends, whilst they're still new and exciting and young... What hope is there?

"Are you not sleeping?" Daehyun's turmoil is interrupted by Youngjae's sleepy voice. "Aren't you tired?"

"I'm thinking."

"Shock, horror. " Light-hearted, teasing. "About?"

Daehyun isn't sure if it's worth saying, but decides his sore cheek would want him to voice his concern. Says, "We haven't spoken properly all day. Or even-- maybe for a few days."

"Yes we have." Youngjae dismisses this, too tired, doesn't understand.

"No, not really."

"Haven't we?"

Youngjae doesn't seem to grasp the weight of this, and Daehyun is feeling irritated. "This has never happened to us before, Jae! We're always talking. We're-- what if this is a _sign_?"

Youngjae scoffs, noses into Daehyun's neck. "I've had a cold and we're tired from the tour and sometimes it's nice to just be in your company. Quietly." He pulls back, and Daehyun can make out the whites of his eyes in the dark. "It doesn't mean anything, not anything bad anyway. It just means that I won't have ear-ache for the rest of my life, because apparently you _can_ shut up sometimes."

Daehyun wants to be offended, but he can't find it in himself. Grins and says, "You really think so? You don't think it's been a bit -- stilted today?"

"Maybe." Youngjae settles back against the pillows, face close to Daehyun's ear again. "But so what? We spend twenty four hours a day together. Why are you suddenly so worried?"

"I just-- I don't want to become one of those silent couples." He admits, feels stupid. _Knows_ it's stupid. "I couldn't think of anything to say in the van today, and I guess it freaked me out." He feels dumb, but glad it's out there, glad to share it. His shoulders feel lighter now, his heart too.

"You're the only person I know who would be worried about the lack of conversation after a seven hour rehearsal." Youngjae moves forward in the dark, places a kiss against Daehyun's jaw, to show he means it affectionately. "You know, if you want to be with someone who will engage you in conversation every waking hour of the day, I think you're going to have trouble finding them."

Daehyun murmurs in agreement and pulls Youngjae close, interlocks their fingers. Thinks about Youngjae's words. Says, "Well, unless I have a doppelganger out there."

And Youngjae laughs, a deep, perfect grumble that shakes the bed a little, and says, "Well, now that you've woken me up, do you want to have a long conversation about doppelgangers, or would you rather we do something else with our mouths?"

(Not another word is spoken.)


End file.
